It hit me like a ton of bricks. Bricks of guilt. Bricks of sorrow. Bricks of fear. My beautiful child was depressed. She was struggling with anxiety. She was on a downhill slide. And I was doing nothing about it. It was hard to admit. It was a hard pill to swallow. Why? Sometimes it is easier not to deal with something, like if you don't look it in the eye and give it a name, it might just go away and disappear forever. You may not know WHAT to do. You might not even know where to start. It can be overwhelming. Then there is the guilt. Why didn't I see this sooner? Why did I pass on THOSE genes? What actions have I done and words have I said that have put chinks in the armor of my darling child without even realizing it? What would people think? What would people think of my family? What would people think of ME? And it goes on...
Then, I realized. THIS IS NOT ABOUT ME! So, I took time to cry a little (maybe a lot). I swallowed my pride. I prayed. I set aside my guilt and picked up my love and my courage, and I put on my big girl panties. If my child was drowning, I would do everything in my power, even to the peril of my own life, to save her. My child was emotionally drowning. So, I started to look for ANSWERS, and I started to take ACTION. This is an ongoing battle, my friends. It is not a "one and done," but there has been PROGRESS. There has been HEALING. And I will keep fighting for my child, because she is WORTH it!!!
We teach our kids to tie their shoes and write their names. We teach them to count to 100, and we teach them their ABC's. We teach them to share and be kind to others (well, we sure do try)… But how often do we take the time to teach kids to be mentally and emotionally healthy? Do we ourselves know how to be mentally and emotionally healthy? Do we put time into training ourselves and gaining the skill set necessary to teach our children and be good examples to them?
I believe that the hardest battles we fight in this life can be internal: how we perceive ourselves, how we perceive the world around us, how we work with positive and negative emotions, the voices that we choose to listen to, thoughts that we give power to. This all happens inside of us, and it can be confusing, overwhelming, and scary. How we react to outward stimuli will largely depend on how we are taking care of the inside.
I don't know all the answers (ha! not even close). All I know is that I have felt called to focus on teaching emotional and mental health to my family and that means learning some skills myself! It has been clumsy, imperfect, and even awkward at times. I still have my training-wheels on, but I sure am pedaling! It's amazing when your awareness is awakened, how things just show up in your life at the right time, from the right people, in the right way.
So this is a call to all of us to open our eyes! Open our hearts! What is happening inside of you? What is happening inside of your children? How does it feel to be them? Have open communication with your children. Help them to learn how to deal with the anxiety, depression, fear, rejection, failure along with all the positive emotions that they may be experiencing. Get help from professionals if that is what is needed.
Your child is worth it! YOU are worth it! There is JOY and LIGHT and LOVE to be had in this life. Let's arm our children with the SKILLS to take care of themselves emotionally and mentally so that they can experience life more abundantly. You will be led in your journey; I am sure of it!
Much Love ❧
Heather
